Kevin Garnett is Overrated

Kevin Garnett of the Minnesota Timberwolves is a very good player. He stands about 7 feet tall, yet has the athleticism of a guard. But Garnett is not one of the game's all-time great players.

Garnett is the best player on a bad team. The truly great ones can at least put their team on their back and guide them to the playoffs. Over half the teams in the NBA make the playoffs, that's not too much to ask.

Essentially, despite Garnett's talent, it boils down to the fact that he's not a winner. The one year the Wolves won a playoff series, he was surrounded by playoff veteran stars Sam Cassell and Latrell Sprewell. Garnett's leadership qualities can justly be questioned. Minnesota is seemingly in constant disarray. KG's inability to lead a winner can possibly be traced to his lack of college experience. Whereas players such as Tim Duncan developed the skills to lead a top collegiate program over four years, Garnett was shortchanged that chance. He's had to learn on the run. It hasn't worked out for him.

During the Wolves playoff runs, I was excited to finally watch Garnett play. It is enjoyable to watch Iverson, Nash, Kidd, Shaq, Lebron and others play basketball. KG turned out to be not very flashy. He just accumulates statistics that don't influence the game as much as they appear. And he disappears towards the end of games.

Kevin Garnett is very good, just look at his numbers and his ability, but to be great in this league, you have to win. And you have to be the reason for the win.

The Racist

Things that a racist says:

I don't see race, we're all human.

Everyone has an equal opportunity in America.

I hear what you're saying, but...

There's no difference between "White Power" and "Black Power."

Things are better than before.

I'm not racist, but...

Get over it.

I Am Prejudice

After depositing money in the bank, I stuck my hand into my pocket with the intent of checking the amount of money that I had left in my wallet. At that moment, I saw a couple of black teenaged boys. I stopped. Embarrassed, I tried to play it off by keeping my hand in my pocket. As I walked by, I thought, "Fuck, I'm prejudice!" What did I think they were going to do, rob me? Of course they weren't.

The thing to do now is to work harder to deprogram myself from the stereotypes that have seeped into my unconsciousness. This is my pledge. Hopefully, being conscious of this event is a start.

Kazakhstan vs. Uzbekistan

Here is an in depth report on Kazakhstan and Uzbekistan:

Kazakhstan: Da Ali G Show's Borat is from there.
Uzbekistan: Useful when "Honolulu" is said in the Geography Game.

Uh, that's it.





People from Turkmenistan are rolling on the floor laughing right now!!

Three Starving Sudanese Men Walk Into A Bar...

In an article on the New York Times webpage about Darfur, the "article tools" were sponsored by WATER.

I get it. The people in Darfur don't even have water to drink, so the fact that WATER sponsors the article tools is ironic. I, for one, love the New York Times' sense of humor! That's almost as funny as the World Food Program cutting food aid to Darfur due to lack of funds. Hilarious.

Mr. Stephen Colbert, you could learn a lot from this kind of humor. You should be more respectful in your joke-making.

Jesus Is Real!

This sign is in Ohio.

The sign after reads, "If you died today, where would you spend eternity?"

I'm guessing I'd spend eternity in Hell (because I'm Jewish), but at least it's better than Ohio!

My Brother's Graduation

My brother is graduating from Miami University in Ohio. We are very proud. I'm looking forward to driving out to the Middle-of-Nowhere, Ohio.

I'm particularly interested in seeing the enormous engraving of Jesus on a church off of Route 70 in Ohio. Also, the tour of the United flight 93 wreckage in Pennsylvania for a "reasonable" price is always intriguing and not despicable.

Sex With Sean Hannity

Just because I want to have sex with Sean Hannity, doesn't make me gay.

There's just something about his masculine disregard for logic that makes my genitals erect. Plus, he has a cute tushy.

Look At My Dog

I've noticed that there are many blogs dedicated to people's dogs. They show pictures of their dogs, write about their dogs, and sometimes include other people's dogs.

Yeah, I get it, you like your dog. One short post and a picture would have conveyed the same message. An entire blog dedicated to dogs is, well, a little crazy. I'd put it a bit above Zacharias Moussaoui-crazy, but below Pat Robertson-crazy. Pat Robertson is a fucking nut job. I mean damn, I think God perpetrated Hurricane Katrina because God hates gay people (Ellen DeGeneres was hosting the Emmy's), but God punishing Ariel Sharon with a stroke for giving back some land? That's even beyond my level.

Anyway, dogs suck. I hate them. They chased me when I was young. And now they're fighting to gain the right to marry gay people, or so Senator Rick Santorum has led me to believe. Maybe I have that backwards. Maybe it's the gay people who want to marry dogs, I forget.

I'm scared of dogs, no matter the size. You know the old saying, "It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the... FUCK! There are dogs chasing me, RUN!!"

Speak English

President George Bush has finally brought the all important issue of translation into the nation's political discouse. He believes that our national anthem should only be sung in English, not spanish.

Personally I'm against translation of any kind. If you write something in a language, it should stay in that language. If we didnt translate the rest of the world's opinions of America into English, then we wouldn't know that they hate us. Then we could act in any way we wanted. I'm for another unjustified war. Let's take out Madagascar. Fuck Madagascar! I mean, look at it, just loitering off the coast of Africa like some kind of punk kid (buy something already or leave!), with its many species of animals, and unpronouncable capital.

I speak one language; English. It's not because I'm an idiot, but because it should be the only world language. My grandma spoke 4 or 5 languages, but you know what? She didn't speak English too good. She had a weird fuckin accent and I couldn't understand her half the time. She didn't write English good either. Because she was stupid.

Back to the issue of the national anthem. It must be sung in English. English is a sacred language. Which language is every bible in each of America's Hilton Hotels written in? It's English of course, which proves that English is a holy language. Francis Scott Key's poem is also sacred (at least the part that is now the national anthem). If you sing it in spanish, you lose the meaning of the song. Especially since the only Spanish I speak is "Yo quero el the Taco Bell." If the song has no meaning, it can't be holy anymore.

If we don't speak English, we won't be a unified nation. And than we won't be able to stand. And it all begins with the national anthem.




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