Our Dear and Fearless Leader declared yesterday to be Voters Appreciation Day. He then threw a party to honor the country's move to democracy. Here are some excerpts from that party that were tape recorded by an anonymous attendee.
Dear and Fearless Leader: "TITTIES! Big or small, round or pointy, I love 'em! Come girls, rub them in my face."
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Dear and Fearless Leader: "Bring that sweet ass over here baby, so I can smack it in the name of democracy!"
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Dear and Fearless Leader: "How 'bout this. I'll shake up this bottle of Diet Caffeine Free Coke and spray it on you like those guys in the music videos."
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Dear and Fearless Leader: "You know, it's great to be the unquestioned leader of a nation, if for no other reason than women will do anything for you for fear of death if they don't comply. It sure makes up for my love life before I became a dictator."
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Dear and Fearless Leader: "Thong, thong, thong, thong, thong."
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