The Karl Rove Thing

All I've been thinking about throughout this whole Karl Rove/CIA saga is that Joe Wilson is a big prick. I mean first this guy uncovers the fact that the intelligence President Bush was basing the Iraq war on was false and then he had the nerve to go and tell people about it! Jerk.

Have we gotten to the point where a president can't tell a huge lie that will result in many people dying and get away with it? Well, if we have, I don't want to be a part of that world. I'm moving to Zimbabwe, where the presidential lying is still robust and unchallenged.

But that's not what this story is all about. Karl Rove uncovered the identity of Valerie Plame, the wife of Joe Wilson, as an undercover CIA agent and had the courage to tell the press about it. The controversy is that Mr. Rove had to saunter over the limits of the law. However, many great men have had to engage in illegal activity in order to enrich the souls of the masses. Martin Luther King did so, enabling blacks to exert their civil rights. Others have done so as well, including Gandhi, Jesus, and Jeffrey Dahmer. Mr. Rove joins these great men.

It takes a brave man to expose a CIA agent, ruining her career, endangering her life, and risking those of her contacts, simply for political revenge. Some may say that its like killing a fly with a sledgehammer, after the fly just pulled your grandmother out of a lake, saving her life. Mr. Rove has never been a slave to public opinion or their so-called morals. The public is filled with idiots anyway.

Of course, being the President's top aid, Rove has access to information that he probably shouldn't. With that, he double-super-secretly told three reports that this bad man Wilson has a CIA wife, "why isn't she in the kitchen?" Of the three, only the gallant Robert D. Novak had the balls to publicize the information. Judith Miller of the New York Times now finds herself in prison and Matthew Cooper, bald-head fat-ass and all, relinquished his source and evaded jail. What will happen to the great Robert Douchebag Novak, you ask? He's invited to the White House this coming Monday, where he'll get to stay in the Lincoln bedroom and have relations with three attractive chix with dix. Lucky man.

Joe Wilson, the man who ruined the illusion of a noble war, the husband of someone whose job forced her to be 'sneaky' (who wears the pants in that family anyway?), and who got a free trip to that vacation spot extraordinaire Niger, actually has the audacity to criticize Karl Rove? What did Wilson do that was illegal? Nothing. No courage. But Mr. Rove released the identity of an active undercover CIA agent. That takes testicles, big spherical red ones! Then he had the guts to lie about sharing the information. Bravo Mr. Rove, bravo! Lying about uncovering a CIA agent as payback for her husband uncovering Mr. Rove's boss's lie, truly genius.

I wonder which presidentially-distributed medal Karl Rove will receive.

I hope it's the Medal of Manliness.