Chinese Battle Royale: Finals

The guys are rested since last Friday and are ready to battle for ultimate glory.

Here's the matchup:
Zhou Enlai vs Sun Yatsen (Important moderate in the CCP against the Nationalist Party member whose legacy has remained in tact)

Zhou Enlai vs Sun Yatsen
Both Zhou Enlai and Sun Yatsen were able to survive and thrive the propaganda battle Mao and the Communist party waged against dissent. Zhou is considered a favorite among many Chinese people, more than Mao and Sun was always seen as a national father, even under Communist China. This battle would be a tough one.

Sun hits Zhou over the head and it's all over. Sorry folks, you got ripped off, what can I say. Sun Yatsen reaches ultimate glory and there are a lot of pissed off people who paid to see this fight.

Meet The Press: Maryland Senate Style

Iraq
Michael Steele's platform on Iraq as announced on Meet The Press is unbelievably callous and downright fucked up. He claims that the Iraqi government needs to decide whether they want to work towards democracy or not. And if they don't he's going to call for the troops home.

I can't believe he's blaming the Iraqi government for the failures in Iraq. That's like blaming the children of murdered parents for not wanting to succumb to the wishes of the murders. Michael Steele's policy on Iraq is that absurd and sad.

Ben Cardin supports involving the international community in helping to solve the problem. I've never understood why we haven't brought the international community into this dilemma.

Now, I support bringing the troops home immediately. Anything short of this assumes that America can actually help rectify a disastrous situation that it created. The reality is that American troops have been put in an impossible situation by Bush and Rumsfeld and need to come home in order to save their lives.

Bipartisanship
Michael Steele handled tough questions about bipartisanship with skill. He was asked whether he was running away from being a Republican and he was able to explain that he is a proud Republican, but it's his intention to break down labels that divide Washington. Cardin stumbled on this issue.

Stem Cells Research and Abortion
Michael Steele is pro-life, but he had trouble admitting as much. Embryos are discarded from fertility clinics all the time and was asked whether that was murder, which is why he doesn't support embryonic stem cell research. He muddled about and never gave a position. Ben Cardin was far more eloquent and definitive in his pro-choice stance.

Supreme Court Nominations
As upsetting as Steele's stance on Iraq was, this issue was his poorest showing. He was asked whether he would have voting against any sitting supreme court justices during confirmation. He repeated the question and tried to weasel out of it. It was fairly pathetic. Cardin was firm and clear.

Affirmative Action
Michael Steele defended his pro-affirmative action stance with clarity, claiming that it should be a system bent on correcting economic wrongs and not racially polarizing. Cardin agreed.


It was unfortunate that Green, Libertarian, Populist candidate Kevin Zeese wasn't included in the debate. However, this debate made me feel stronger about voting for Ben Cardin.

Baseball Wrap-up

This season saw a suspicious amount of homeruns, possibly to compensate for the potential decline with the institution of steroid testing. But this year was devoid of big stories (except for Barry Bonds passing Babe Ruth in career homeruns), which is a good thing nowadays. Hopefully, baseball can move on from the steroid debacle and become the game it used to be. The game I remember when I was 10 years old. And even something more.

Message From Grandpa 4

My Grandpa died 7 years ago today. Whenever he visited, we used to sit out on the porch and talk. We'd talk about sports mostly. He'd smoke cigarettes and the smoke would always seem to find me no matter where I sat. I remember one specific day, when I was 12 years old, Grandpa told me, "There's nothing in the world worse than losing a child." He was talking about my dad.

It's made me think about the soldiers in Iraq. "There's nothing in the world worse than losing a child." It's made me think about their families.

"There's nothing in the world worse than losing a child." It's made me think about the people of Iraq who have been affected by war through death. "There's nothing in the world worse than losing a child."

Yeah well, losing a Grandpa ain't too great either.

China's Battle Royale: Semis

2 more wins to ultimate glory.

Here are the matchups:
Mao Zedong vs Zhou Enlai (Communist Party leader vs his most trusted advisor)
Sun Yatsen vs Yen Fu (Father of the modern China battles late 19th century intellectual)

Mao Zedong vs Zhou Enlai
At first, Mao makes Zhou look like a follower. Mao Zedong is about to win easily. Zhou looks overmatched. But that was Zhou's strategy all along. Zhou takes the occasional well-timed shot and then retreats. He knows that his he goes for an all out assault Mao will kill him. Some wonder how Zhou is even able to do what he's doing, however carefully calculated his actions are. But Mao is still the boss of this one. This battle drags out and Mao maintains his lead, covering up any harm Zhou may cause him. Mao's legend appears to have trumped Zhou. Slowly but surely, Zhou comes back. Once one of Mao's weaknesses surfaces, others follow. Zhou capitalizes. Soon Mao is fighting for his life. Zhou deliberate method seems to have worked. Mao's wild swings just hit poor bystanders. He leaves a gash on Zhou's face just before he succumbs to Zhou's punishment. It's all over. Zhou Enlai upsets his master and advances to the finals.

Sun Yatsen vs Yen Fu
Yen Fu wizardry with words works towards a win for a while. The tide turns quickly in Sun Yatsen's direction. Sun Yatsen has the crowd behind him and it only fuels his momentum. Sun puts Yen in a precarious position. Yen tries to write a letter to get help. But the letter is in classical Chinese and no one reads that any more. Yen Fu is all alone and against a man who has the support of the people. This turns into a blowout. It's all over. Sun Yatsen will take on Zhou Enlai for ultimate glory.

The Bad and the Ugly

After Rush Limbaugh was finished shaking about, mocking Michael J. Fox, he gave me a call. He told me that AIDS was a Democratic conspiracy, the Holocaust was a lie, and he then bit off the head of a baby and ate it. Then he attempted to jerk off the dead baby. I guess what I'm trying to say here is Rush Limbaugh is not a good person.

My New Anti-Gay Group

I want to start an anti-gay organization. I'd call it something like Families Against the Gay Agenda.

Then I'd have a change of heart, but keep the same name. That way, gay rights activists can say things like, "Even FAGA supports legislation banning discrimination based on sexual preference," or "even the most anti-gay group in America, FAGA, now supports gay marriage."

China's Battle Royale: Quarterfinals

The guys have rested up since Friday's first round and are now ready for action. 3 more wins for ultimate glory.

Here are the matchups:
Mao Zedong vs Chiang Kai-shek (the CCP leader in a historical rematch with the KMT/GMD chief)
Zhou Enlai vs Deng Xiaoping (Mao's #2 vs Mao's eventually successor)
Sun Yatsen vs Hu Jintao (the father of modern Chinese nationalism against the leader of current China)
Yen Fu vs Liang Qichao (Battle between two late 19th century intellectuals)

Let's get it on...

Quarterfinals
Mao Zedong vs Chiang Kai-shek
Chiang Kai-shek takes a nominal lead in this contest, but it's clear that he may not be able to hold on for long. Mao chips away at Chiang's legs. Then Mao works on Chiang's arms. The tide shifts as Chiang fights back. Mao was inches from extinction. Chiang knocked him out and walked away, believing that he was victorious. Then Mao marched his way and thrashed Chiang. It's all over. Mao moves onto the Semifinals.

Zhou Enlai vs Deng Xiaoping
In the beginning, Deng looks good. Deng unleashes a free market of punches to Zhou Enlai's face. But Zhou Enlai has seen this before. He knows Deng's moves ahead of time and throws a balance of his own kicks and punches. Deng feebly tries to fight back, but this is turning into a massacre and it will be overshadow Deng's previous victories, as it should. Zhou wins and will face Mao in the next round.

Sun Yatsen vs Hu Jintao
Sun Yatsen sets the tone from the outset. Anything Hu Jintao tries to do, he's beaten to the punch. Hu rolls with the punches... to the ground. It's a party in Hu's face and Sun's strong fists are invited. It's all over. Sun wins.

Yen Fu vs Liang Qichao
At first glance, this matchup appears to be equal. Liang Qichao's attacks are more varied than those of Yen Fu's, but Yen's are focused and land true. Liang decides to take a different approach deep into the contest. It works and Liang pounds Yen Fu like thunder crashing against the spirit of the nation, or something. But Yen Fu translates Liang's energy into a wealthy array of eye gouges. Liang is poked blind and it's all over. Yen will face Sun in the semis.

You're Crazy!

I went over to my friend Adam's house a few years ago. My mission was to help him. He's mentally irregular and I get nervous because he has a myriad of weapons in his house.

Before going over I gave him a call:
"Hey Adam, please get rid of your weapons."
"You keep saying that. What weapons? I don't have any."
"Cut out the bullshit, you have them. Get rid of them or I'm coming over!"
"I don't have them, and you can't come over tonight, I'm busy. How about next week?"
"You're fucking crazy man. You can't be trusted with those guns, get rid of them, or I'll do it for you. Throw them out by 4pm or I'm coming over!"
"I can't give you something I don't have! I have to get back to work, damn."

I knew if I didn't act quickly he might unleash his fury on his neighbor Moishe, or worse, he could come to my house. I rang his doorbell. "Just a minute," he called. Five seconds later, I busted down the door. "Where are they?!" I screamed.

"Where are what?" Adam answered.
"The weapons! You're a madman. Give 'em to me."
"I don't have anything man. And quit calling me crazy."
"You need help man. I'm here to help you."
"That's it, I'm calling the police." Adam said. Then I beat him, screaming "You need help, you're crazy, you need me."

Now Adam is institutionalized in a mental health facility. His life has fallen apart. He is deemed to be crazy now, though there is no credible evidence that he was ever diagnosed as crazy before. I went to visit him recently.

"Hey Adam. I want to help you."
Adam began sniveling, "No, just leave me alone."
"You need me Adam or you'll be worse off."
"No, I don't trust you, just leave."
"Adam, only I can help you. Without me, you're life will be a disaster."
"My life is a disaster because of you! Sure, things weren't perfect, but you ruined my life's fragil stability. Just get the fuck away from me."

Poor Adam, he still doesn't know what's best for him. He needs my help.

Racial Profiling

Racial profiling just doesn't make any logical sense to me. If O.J. stabs a couple of people to death, what bearring does that have on Fred's propensity to kill? None.

Likewise, if Muhammad A. hijacks a plane, doesn't mean Fareed Z. will do so as well.