"Despite all the wickedness in the wilderness, and the fact that my life kind of been a mess, if I die tomorrow I feel no bitterness. No sorrow and not one bit of stress. I'm feeling blessed that I made it this far, my 26th year, my 14th bar. I see the sunshine, feel the bass line. Listen to it telling us not to waste time."
Lately, I've withdrawn into my mind. Everyone and everything are mere images in the world that my mind has created. I act one way, receive a response, and then retreat back into my mind where it's safe. No one is hurt in my mind. No one is suffering. The outside world is simply a dangerous array of colors that will never make any sense. There are intangible concepts of love, respect, empathy that fly through the air, but they are always fleeting. They enter my soul and just as quickly escape and I am left alone. I will never truly know anyone else. That reality is difficult to accept.
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