Gluttony

A little while back airlines decided to charge extremely fat passengers for two seats. I think it was a good idea. If your fat ass takes up two seats, surprise(!) you should have to pay for two seats! They should have to pay double for everything.

Society's definition of fat includes people who are only a little overweight. Mine does not. I'm talking about people who make you gag to look at them. They're so ugly they bring down our standard of living. I live in constant fear of having to look at their fat ugliness. I mean damn, do a fucking jumping jack or something, tubs.

I'm not talking about people who are genetically heavy either. I'm talking about people who eat so much they influence the price of food. I've got to pay 8 damn dollars for a fucking cheeseburger because Flabs McGee can't stop at just 6 per meal. It's called the law of supply and demand fat ass, but you haven't been able to read a book since 1987 because you can't see over your humongous man boobs.

Put down the sausage stuffed with lard wrapped in bacon and run a little bit. I do it and I have a rippling six pack. Or you could play basketball; I do. I'm better than any fat person not named Oliver Miller or Robert Traylor. And even then...

Either quit your gluttonous ways or stay in your house and get the fuck away from me. I'm not in the mood to throw-up today thank you.