Since 2003 I've been telling everyone that my girlfriend Cara's body was da bomb. My friends just found out this week that I don't have a girlfriend and Cara's body never existed. Now they're telling everyone.
You'd think I'd be humiliated. The last four year of my life were a lie. You'd be wrong. I've been through this before. In fact, guess what I'm doing. No, I'm not hiding from everyone in disgrace, you smartass. I'm questioning my friends' judgment. They just don't want to see me shine. Cara does exist! Her body is smoking! Run for the hills, she's about to explode!