Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Evil Leaders League, Week 4

The Nats just lost in 14 innings, so this is coming 5 innings late. Here are the results from Week 4 of the ELL:

Sarkozy vs Chavez
France's president Nicolas Sarkozy met with former ELL star Muammar Ghadafy, the leader of Libya, after the latter released six Bulgarian medics accused of spreading HIV to Libyan children. The medics claimed they confessed to the crime after being tortured. Libya had maintained that one contracts the virus through contact with Bulgarian medics. Sarkozy rewarded Libya's gesture. Hugo Chavez of Venezuela is getting ready to expel foreign critics from his country. Limiting foreigners' free speech in combination with curtaining domestic criticism, is a nice way to gain ground in the ELL. But at least Chavez isn't French.
winner: Chavez

Ahmadinejad vs Putin
Iran's Mahmoud Ahmadinejad continues to scream that Iran should be allowed to have a nuclear program to anyone who will listen. Unfortunately for him, people aren't listening anymore since Lindsay Lohan was accused of another DUI. Listen girlfriend, get your act together! Vladimir wants to beef up the Russian military and his floppy genitals. He wants to increase spying on the west and the length of his erect schlong. He views the US and ED as his major threats. An irritable, determined, and sexually inadequate leader has a good chance at performing evil-doings.
winner: Putin

al-Bashir vs Lukashenko
Omar al-Bashir, the loquacious leader of Sudan, visited the genocide-happy region of Darfur for the first time since the area began witnessing the world's latest holocaust. During the same time, United States presidential hopeful Chris Dodd visited Iowa 173 times. The president of Belarus is Alexander Lukashenko. Belarus missed its last gas payment to Russia, which might mean the gas might stop flowing eastward. Probably not, but embarrassing financial situations don't help with the women or in the ELL. Omar al-Bashir avenges last season's decision against Lukashenko.
winner: al-Bashir

Karimov vs Kim
Islam Karimov, the precocious president of Uzbekistan is likely to stay in power despite proposed elections scheduled for this year. Karimov could invoke several legal measures to ensure he does. Kim Jong-Il of North Korea will stay in power. To prove this, Kim has banned smoking in his country. After his favorite magician was trapped in a box by metal swords and severely injured, Kim banned metal swords, boxes, and injuries to magicians. Kim reportedly looks emaciated due to a hunger strike until the Trix rabbit gets to eat some cereal.
winner: Kim

Chavez 3-1
Kim J-I 3-1
Putin 3-1
al-Bash 3-1
Karimo 2-2
Ahmad 2-2
Lukash 0-4
Sarkozy 0-4

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