Lessons Learned

So I shit my pants. I'm a little proud. That makes 3 countries. It gets much worse, but maybe some things are better left unsaid. Let's just say, I hope I don't wind up with that pink sock.

I was so delusional Sunday night I believed that people here raised crickets and then put them outside people's hotel windows and the hotel charged 30 rupees to get rid of the cricket. Well, I wasn't gonna fall for that scam. I also was convinced that I had walked for miles and miles looking for a hotel room without a cricket outside of the window, but couldn't find one.

Yesterday I realized that wasn't true. In fact, I started to doubt whether there was a cricket at all. Then it came back last night. I went outside to get it. I don't know what happened, but me and the security guard got the thing to shut the fuck up. I finally had a good full night's sleep for the first time in days. I had chicken for lunch today. I'm still gonna take it easy today, but I really do think I'm almost better now. I have a violent cough that rips apart my throat and chest and feels like a punch to the gut, but hey, that's nothing.

In America we fear other places. before I left everyone was telling me, "Don't eat this, don't drink that. Watch out for this. And for G-d's sake never ever do that." Because of everyone, I'm scared to death of every bug that comes within a mile of me. But there's nothing to be afraid of. Like I've said, India didn't make me sick, the fact that I'm a stubborn idiot did. I walked for miles and miles in extreme heat because I didn't want to haggle with the rickshaw drivers. Then I just decided I was better right when things were very bad. I'm a fucking moron.

Every local who comes up to me on the street eventually offers me weed. They claim it's legal here in Mysore. I find that highly doubtful. I don't smoke weed at all, but I'd like to find out for sure just to be able to call them out on their bullshit. The Australian guy that I've been having dinner with said that probably once you light up the police are right there, demand a bribe of 10,000 rupees and give the guy who offered the weed to you a little "reward." If anyone can find out for sure whether weed is legal in cafes in Mysore, that'd be great.

The Australian guy and I talked about Canadian Hip Hop at dinner last night, because that's what all Americans and Australians talk about when they get together. It was a very nice place with a guy playing a tabla and another one playing a keyboard right behind me. Unfortunately I couldn't enjoy it too much right then.