The Cruise

Nassau, Bahamas
We stopped in Nassau, Bahamas for a few hours. White people hang out on the one tourist street and on Paradise Island. Very few venture past even a block outside of that boundary. I walked around the neighborhoods and discovered that many people live in one-floor houses covered in fluorescent colors- blues, greens, pinks. The people were very nice and polite. Whenever I made eye contact, I was shocked- coming from the DC area - to get a "hello" back. It was never a phony or a mocking greeting. A few guys came up and just started talking to me. In fact, I was offered weed twice before 8:30 in the morning! They drive on the British side of the road, but they have cars with the steering wheel on the right side and those with it on the left, which freaked me out.

I walked by the parliament and saw the parking spaces for the president of the senate and the speaker of the house. Across the street was the parking spot for the opposition leader, which is hilarious- make him walk across the street to work. Also, if he becomes troublesome, maybe he has an accident while crossing the street. Hey, you never know. St. Thomas
St. Thomas had the same divide as Nassau. Tourists stayed along one street and no white people could be found even two blocks from the water. This was the only stop I walked around with ma and we tried to go down one street laced with apartment buildings. An old local man stopped us and asked, "Are you strangers?" Of course he was asking if we were foreigners, but my answer should've been, "No, she's my mom." After replying yes, he advised us not to walk down that road. I asked, "Why, is it dangerous?" He thought for a second and said yes. Then I asked, "Even in daylight?" He answered upset, "Fine, if you want to go down there, go ahead." We decided not to. I think he just didn't want us walking through his neighborhood.

We were walking by one intersection when a police man got on his loud speaker from inside his police car and started ordering people around. "Sir, you're blocking the road, you've got to make a left." The taxi driver flipped out, but reluctantly did what he was told. Taxis are weird looking, see below. In St. Thomas, people drive on the British side, but there are solely American-style cars. Then the police man announced, "Young man, put down that phone." I turned and a young man in his car closed his cell phone and set it down. I tried really hard not to fall down laughing.
San Juan, Puerto Rico
I believe I walked the entire length and breadth of San Juan. It has a big city feel, but the buildings are covered in typically Caribbean fluorescent colors- pinks, peaches, greens- which is cool. It's a very beautiful city and probably the only place of the four that I would go back to. Nothing of note happened. Labadee, Haiti
Labadee is a beach-side resort that Royal Caribbean bought. It's fenced off. I walked by the fence and encountered some locals who raised their hands and said, "Man, give me money." It was neither rude nor threatening though. I think one kid did mention a knife, but I really wasn't alarmed. It was a concrete example of the division between the haves and the have-nots. I knew that was the case, but it's another thing when you experience it.

The compound had a "flea market" and an "artisans shop," I believe the whole thing was contrived. The merchants all worked together, and were selling Labadee shirts (I was offered weed again in the "flea market"). A Haitian guy was working a Ben and Jerry's stand and 20 minutes later someone from Royal Caribbean had taken over. They sold drinks called Coco Loco's, which are the four most annoying syllables since Donald Rumsfeld.

I went into the clear Caribbean waters and a woman was snorkeling near me. She raised her head out of the water and said, "Be careful where you step." I asked, "Because of the rocks?" I had already stubbed a few of my toes on the numerous stones. "No, there are millions of sea urchins," she answered, as if I were the biggest idiot in the world. But she didn't know what she was talking about. I could see that there weren't any "sea urchins." And I don't think she was too observant anyway, considering that while she was snorkeling around me, I peed in the water and she didn't notice. That's a true story by the way. And yes, I am proud of it.