Last night's episode of Chopped on the Food Network featured a new titan in the world of preparing gastronomic delights. During the main course portion of the competition, host Ted Allen revealed the ingredients in the basket which included truffle oil, lychee berries, and a human spleen.
Upon viewing the basket, Chef Anne Burrell began vomiting violently. After several minutes of continuous retching, she made an executive decision to only use the first two ingredients. She whipped up a scrumptious foie gras with a lychee Worcestershire sauce. The judges felt her dish was delicious, expertly mixing sweet with savory, but Chef Anne was punished for failing to use all of the ingredients in the basket.
Chef Bobby Flay wept openly after opening the basket. He made a spleen stir fry, adding okra and roasted brussel sprouts to the dish. Judge Geoffrey Zakarian felt the stir fry was too salty, likely due to Chef Bobby's unceasing crying. Judge Amanda Freitag loved the dish while Marcus Samuelsson passed out before tasting the dish.
In a surprise upset, Michael Symon was ousted in the appetizer round by a relative unknown. Chef Jeffrey Dahmer dominated the competition with his spleen souffle. Chefs Bobby and Jeffrey advanced to the dessert round, where Chef Jeffrey concocted a delectable dessert of ladyfingers made out of actual lady fingers.
Dahmer advances to the championship round in Chopped's All Star tournament. He's joined there by Idi Amin, the anthropophaginian Liberian warlord General Butt Naked, and the left flanker on the 1972 Uruguayan national rugby team. A charity of the winner's choice will receive $50,000.