Saturday, May 01, 2010

Tim James's New Ad

Alabama gubernatorial candidate, Tim James (again, not the former U. of Miami basketball star who played in Turkey, Japan, and Israel after three NBA seasons and has since joined the army), has announced another controversial proposal. You may recall that he recently demanded that Alabamians learn English if they wanted to live in the state, as if people needed another disincentive to live in Alabama.

James has taken things one step further. In a new ad, James tells his fellow Alabamians that, if elected governor, people will be whipped based on their expertise of a foreign language. "For every non-English word you know, you get one lash," James informs the viewing public.

The ACLU is up in arms over James's latest eccentric proposal. They argue that English shares many words with other languages and James has put forth no clear policy towards whether a person would be lashed for knowing one of these bilingual words. These words straddle the line because they are both English and foreign at the same time. For example, taco.

When asked to comment on the ACLU's criticism of his proposal, Tim James seemed confused by the idea that a word could take part in more than one language. At one point, it seemed James lacked the basic mental abilities to comprehend the notion of language in and of itself as he began alternately barking and meowing incessantly during the interview for no discernable reason.

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