Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Evil Leaders League Finals, Game 3

For the first time in Evil Leaders League history, the Finals have moved to a deciding third game. This one will determine the evil champion for Season 3. Let's see who won it all. The official ELL site is here.

Ahmadinejad vs Kim
Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad made two gaffes this week. The first gaffe was his customary boasting that Iran is a powerful country with nuclear weapons. He states, to anyone who will listen, that his country has nuclear weapons. Mahmoud, you say it too much, it's just not believable. It's like the high school boy who claims that he has sex all the time. That kid is obviously a virgin and suffers from low self-esteem. His second gaffe comes in the form of a statement. He claimed that people from Semnan province are "bitter, which causes them to cling to guns or religion or to antipathy towards Israel or anti-American sentiment." Ahmadinejad added, "And thank Allah that they do. It's the only reason I'm in power. And I'm glad they buy the whole nuclear weapons bullshit. That should distract people from the fact that I screwed up the economy."

North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il is a dictator, a strong man, a cult-personality leader, a manipulator, and an incredibly callous man. All of these attributes help to explain Kim's success in the ELL. His recent foray into evilness includes taking control of the local markets that litter North Korea's landscape. All politics are local, even for authoritarians. Kim Jong-Il does not have to succumb to any sense of accountability. His country is at the mercy of his discretion. Other nations take his threats of nuclear annihilation seriously and they provide him with aid, so that he can hold off a revolt from his starving constituency just a bit longer. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad isn't anywhere near as evil as Kim. Ahmadinejad doesn't even deserve to buy Kim's evil hair gel.
winner: Kim
series: Kim 2-1


Congratulations to Kim Jong-Il for winning his first Evil Leaders League championship! The season in review extravaganza is still to come.

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