Tuesday, January 10, 2006

The Probability That I Will Be A Serial Killer

Reasons why I will be a serial killer:

  • I'm kind of a loner.
  • I keep odd hours.
  • I like yelling.
  • Little ridiculous things piss me off. For example, Tom peeks into the house that Jerry is staying in and sees a fire blasting in the fireplace. Tom decides to enter the house through the chimney. YOU JUST SAW THAT THERE WAS A FIRE GOING IN THE FIREPLACE YOU STUPID CAT! Of course, Jerry fans the fire further once he notices Tom in the chimney. Goddamn!
  • I get angry sometimes.
  • I have a constant conversation in my head. That's ok, but sometimes I get too excited with what I'm thinking and start thinking out loud. You would say that I talk to myself.
  • White.
  • I have spurts where I just hate people in general.
  • Movies tend to influence me greatly.
  • I don't like puppies. (Scared of 'em.)
  • I have a car with a roomy trunk.

Reasons why I will not be a serial killer:

  • I don't say hello to my neighbors.
  • Enough people would have suspected it.
  • I hate people because I wish peace for the world and people (for example George Bush) make that aim difficult.
  • Jewish. Fuck, David Berkowitz, the Son of Sam killer, never mind.
  • I don't like cereal. (That would've been funnier if I wasn't writing this. Plus, I do like cereal).
  • I'm too cute.
  • My favorite beverage is Slurpees.
  • If I make a promise, I must keep it. So, if you know me, just make me promise not to kill you.
  • My New Year's Resolution is to have no one I know die this year. The chances of that are enhanced if I don't kill anyone I know.
  • I don't like interacting with strangers.
  • I received my moral foundation from the Cosby Show.
  • Hey, hey, c'mon!
  • I have no desire to be a serial killer. You really have to want it. I don't.
  • I don't own a gun.
  • I am morally against the killing of anyone for any reason.

Will I be a serial killer?
Probably, all I can say is that I'm not coming anywhere near you.
No you won't. I want to have your baby.
Free polls from Pollhost.com

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You should eat your sugary cereal with haterade instead of milk or slushy juice.

Anonymous said...

I voted no....not coz i want to have your baby because you still hug your "mommy pillow" and sleep every night!!