Monday, August 11, 2008

USA, Number One

The U.S. 4 X 100 meter freestyle relay team eked out a win against the favored French today. The frogs were croaking then they were choking. I'm not sure what the rules are in France, but if you promise to smash the other team, you can't turn around and lose. That's unacceptable in America. Winning by a small margin isn't even an option in that scenario. But maybe snooty pretentiousness coupled with a lack of results flies in France. History tends to confirm that hypothesis.

France has been riding America's coattails since the American Revolution inspired the lesser French Revolution. The Nazis dominated the country creating Vichy France. I don't remember there being a Vichy America. Know why? Because France sucks. After this most recent embarrassment, perhaps they should finally just give up and cede themselves to Belgium.

Even if France doesn't give its sovereignty to Belgium, bigmouth Alain Bernard should probably go into hiding. Might I suggest one of the former colonies of the brutal French Empire as a possible hideaway, you foot-in-mouth goat turd.

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