For The Love Of Hate: The Riccio-Hale Story

A group of charismatic opinionated leaders gathered for the National Konvention for Koncerned Kaucasians (N-KKK) . Unbeknownst to the rest of the members, emotions were brewing between two participants.

The eyes of Bill Riccio, a member of Birmingham's KKK among other groups, kept wandering the room hoping to catch the eyes of another. Bill wished that Matthew Hale, the leader of the Creativity Movement, would speak. It would be an excuse to stare at those luscious lips and gaze into those heavenly eyes.

What Bill didn't know was that the same emotions were welling up in Matt's body. Their eyes searched the room, always with the intent of eventually reaching each other. Then Matt spoke, giving a particularly heinous anti-gay speech as Bill's heart fluttered, his male anatomy extending with anticipation. Matt was done; Bill forced himself to look away.

Then the moment happened. Their eyes met. Their probably blue eyes locked and their lives would never be the same.


After the conference ended, Bill timed it so that he would accidentally bump into Matt. His nerves made his bosom jiggle. Bill's shoulder scraped Matt's back. Matt turned and was shocked; there before his eyes was the epitome of beauty, Bill Riccio.

Bill tried to say something, anything, but his throat had gone dry, "Um.. I loved your speech about [anti-black slur]."
"Oh, thanks. You really stuck it to those [several anti-Jew slurs in a row]. I loved the way you showed how they [anti-Jew rhetoric] and use that money to help those [anti-black slurs] and promote a [anti-gay slur] lifestyle," Matt complimented.
Bill was overcome with glee. He attempted to compose himself. "Coming from you, that means a lot."
"Well it's the truth," Matt replied, "Do you... I don't know... want to get together sometime? You know, to talk about the movement, I mean."
Bill could hardly contain himself. "Of course. I want to! Uh, to talk about the movement."


Life is hard and lonely for today's vicious racist. It seems that no one understands their struggle. This was a feeling that Matt and Bill knew all too well. They could sense the empathy of each other's eyes. They scheduled to meet three weeks after the N-KKK. Bill thought about the forthcoming meeting everyday. Matt was confused at first. He knew homosexuality was wrong. But this truth seemed less certain now. He couldn't fight this urge. He had to let his inhibitions go. Waking up to thoughts of Bill, Matt slowly moved his hand southward and began imagining that it was Bill's hand instead. If only.


The day of the meeting arrived. Matt washed his body vigorously in his hotel room, hoping with good reason. Bill couldn't wait to meet his mentor. He noticed that his penis had seemed to wake up from a deep slumber over the previous three weeks. Bill wasn't sure what the sudden awakening was about. But he knew he wanted to see the man who had sparked his love of hating different groups of people, Matthew Hale.

"Hey Bill. Great place you got here. Really conducive for cultivating a pure white culture."
"Thanks Matt. New haircut? Very Hitler-like." Both men's hearts raced. Blood ran to places that they wouldn't have expected one short month before. Bill was looking forward to discussing white power, but pleasant, yet unwelcome images of Matt in all his naked glory kept creeping into his head. Matt wasn't sure how to profess his attraction for Bill. He understood the consequences of his feelings for Bill, but he was a slave to his heart.

They sat across from each other at a table and attempted to get down to business. "So the [anti-Muslim slur] is attempting to infiltrate this white country," Matt remarked, praying that his ankle would touch Bill's under the table. Bill tried to concentrate, but Matt's pure vanilla face looked so delicious. "Yeah, the [anti-gay slur, even though he was referring to Muslims] are the new [anti-black slur]. Now they own stores like the [anti-Chinese slur, but I think he meant an anti-Korean slur. I'm just saying, you don't know the context, I do]." Their legs accidentally touched and both were in ecstasy. Bill still fought his urges.

Before they knew what happened, they were holding hands, conversing about having sex with pure white women. Matt scooted his chair next to Bill on his left. Bill was conflicted. His heart jumped out of his chest and into Matt's body, but his head knew this was wrong. He felt awkward. Vulnerable to Matt's advances. Matt reached over with his left and placed his hand on Bill's thigh. Matt stroked it with his index finger while whispering that the Holocaust never happened [yet they worship Hitler for killing so many Jews, I don't get that], periodically blowing into Bill's ear. Bill began playing with the back of Matt's left hand. Matt's right hand began rubbing Bill's back, occasionally slipping below. Bill felt the battle between his throbbing stick of white pride and his anti-gay heritage. He wished he didn't want it. Or he wished he could simply let go and allow Matt to lick his body like a horse with a sugar cube.

Matt moved his hand up Bill's thigh, and slowly reached glory. After a few seconds of delight, Bill stood up, his erection clearly apparent. "I can't do this Matt. I'm sorry. I'm not a [anti-gay slur] like those [anti-Jew slur]. It's not right."

Matt stood up slowly, compassionately. He placed his hands on Bill's shoulders and hugged him. They then stared into each other's eyes. "Bill, you know we can't fight it. You have to do what's in your white heart. Listen to your Aryan heart my brother." Then Matt moved closer to Bill. Their lips touched ever so slightly. And Matt moved away. Before he could get far, Bill grabbed him and their tongues swirled around each other. They exchanged white saliva for over a minute, moving their hands up and down each other’s bodies, exploring like a puppy in a new surrounding.

First Matt took off his shirt and then he freed Bill of his. And well, you get the picture. They had sex.

Nats At The Break

I'm not going to write anything outlandish as respect for the last post. The Nats are 38-52 at the All Star break. Injuries to starting pitchers and the inability of the lineup to come up with the big hit are the reasons for the poor start.

The Nats have picked up a new owner during the first half of this season. The clouds of impeding change have glided over this ballclub. Who's going? Who's staying?

The Nats have a number of good players, but no one can replace Alfonso Soriano. So So is the heart of the team and by far the best player. Unfortunately, he's forced to hit leadoff, simply because the Nats don't have another player who could fill that role.

Nick Johnson, Ryan Zimmerman, and So So have been the bright sports all season long. Hopefully Nicky can stay healthy all year and for years to come. If not, trade him. Z will just keep improving offensively and defensively at 3rd base. I like the tandem of Z and So So and I hope they'll be on the team for a long time.

All reports have Jose Guillen on the way out. If that's true, I'd like to thank him for being the team's star for the first season in DC.

The second half will probably see a run made by the Nats, especially if players stay healthy. Will it be enough to be part of a playoff race, is the question. It's an outside shot, but I have faith. The other interesting story will be on the roster come August.

Concerned

My blog is a place where I air out my extremely sarcastic side and attempt to offend, hopefully for the purpose of bettering the world in some very minute fashion. Every once in a while I'll check the various searches that have brought readers to my site. Two especially have really saddened me:

"they grabbed me" table tied rape

"guys grabbed my ass"

I do not know the origin of these searches. If your serious search has brought you to my site, I truly apologize, but I would like to help in some way possible. Here are some links for you. Please remember that you are valuable.

Here are some links to help you:

rape abuse and incest national network
http://www.rainn.org/

the rape crisis center
http://www.therapecrisiscenter.org/

women organized against rape
http://www.woar.org/hotline.asp

for men who want to help, men against rape
http://www.rapeis.org/activism/prevention/menagainstrape.html

More On Hitler's Personal Life

Adolf Hitler used to lick public toilet seats (men's and women's). Through this hobby, he developed mustache crabs.


If Hitler was alive today, I wouldn't smack him around. Violence against him wouldn't help anything; it wouldn't bring back the dead. I don't fight fire with fire, I fight it with water. So, I'd wait until we were stuck in an elevator in between floors and then piss my pants and let it fester.*



* author's note - I'm used to the smell of my own urine.

The New 14 Words

"My arm hurts from heiling Hitler. I can't count, how many words is that?"

David H-duk's Rebuttle

With voices in my head like that, who needs enemies!

David H-duk Is An Idiot

David H-duk is quite possibly the biggest loser ever. His whole world view is a joke. He's what is called a bleeding-heart liberal. He wants peace and happiness for all, but he has no grasp of reality. Blanket statements such as "All war is wrong," are nice sentiments, but they don't help. Sometimes, war is necessary. If we followed his logic, the most vicious dictators would still be in power. And what about the Holocaust? What good would non-violent activism have done in that situation?

This guy is a closet socialist, or at least a social democrat. Yet he has no idea how economies work. He doesn't know what the federal reserve board does. He can't even explain his position on fair trade. He knows it's good (he can "feel it"), but that's about it. He knows there's a difference between debt and a deficit, but he doesn't remember which is which. Moron.

According to Mr. H-duk, everyone is oppressed. Let's see him show the link between slavery and today. Women? More women go to college than do men, so they have an equal opportunity. Immigrants? This is a country of laws; immigrants can come, but it must be legally, otherwise, they'll be no jobs for regular Americans. Plus, they're paid such low wages, their presence is just bad for everyone. Gays should be allowed to marry, there's really no good argument against that. Ok, so David has one valid point out of a thousand.

He's all pro-Jewish, but I never see him at synagogue. He can't sing the songs (he can't sing, true, but he also doesn't know the words). He knows very little of Jewish history, tradition, and culture. Trying to grab onto any "Other" identity, are we David?

In addition, he's short. He's not as good a basketball player as he thinks (just put a taller awkward guy on him and he's confused, plus he's a streaky shooter and has become a weak defender, especially in the post). He's too scared to get a real job. He is inferior to every other world history grad student at George Mason. He thinks he's so funny, but most people don't even get his sarcasm. He has few friends (who, the fat guy? he doesn't count) and women don't like him. In short (like him), David H-duk is an idiot.

Ask An Average Muslim

As with most Americans, I've been hearing and reading a lot about Muslims in the news for the last few years. The news has made me want to learn more about this strange and mysterious creature. So I decided to ask an average Muslim named Sherkhan, an American-born son of Pakistani immigrants, (who has been a friend of mine for years, considering he's come over to my house numerous times for Passover and I've observed the fast for the holy month of Ramadan with him, we went to college together and traveled to China since).

Our interview was conducted over email, because he is in Egypt right now.

Q: Are you a terrorist?
A: Well I do get pretty angry when my team loses in the Finals after being up 2-0 (see www.nba/mavericks/)

Q: Do you hate America?
A: No, I just hate pussies who blog about religions they know nothing about and then hide behind the anonymity of the Internet to escape the well deserved condemnation from their fellow Americans.

Q: Do you agree with al-Qaeda's aims?
A: No, they are a nihilistic terrorist organization that targets civilians and uses the banner of Islam to justify their atrocities. The Quran is a very explicit on the subject of suicide and the killing of innocent people. Commit suicide--you go to hell, no exceptions.

Q: What's up with those 72 virgins?
A: Its actually a translation thing. Arabic The Islamic scholar Yusuf Ali defines the word "Houris" in his English interpretation of Qu'ran as "Youths of perpetual freshness." He also described them in his commentary: "The companionship of Beauty and Grace is one of the highest pleasures of life. In this bodily life it takes bodily form. In the higher life it takes a higher form...The pronoun in Arabic is in the feminine gender. It is made clear that these maidens for heavenly society will be of special creation,-of virginal purity, grace, and beauty, inspiring and inspired by love, with the question of time and age eliminated." Women get the same deal.

A more complete explanation can be found at:
http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node=72%20Virgins%20in%20Paradise

Q: What's your view on Israel?
A: I believe that Israel was created after the atrocities of WWII and that Jews were desperate to create a homeland of their own. I don't think its appropriate for countries to be based on ethnic /religious lines alone, even though that's how almost every country outside the Western Hemisphere is. Still, Israel's been there for 50+ years and time tends to legitimize things (I wouldn't want Pocahontas' ancestors launching a guerrilla war to drive me into the sea.) It's also remarkable how much territory they have returned after military capture (Sinai, Lebanon, Gaza) On the other hand the wall they have been building in the West Bank is turning it into an apartheid state. I could go on for pages, but to sum up: Israel should not be destroyed, Zionism is bad, all people should have freedom to worship in in Jerusalem.

Q: What's your view of Jews?
A: Jews are awesome. Where would we be without Whoopi Goldberg? --She's Jewish right? Actually Muslims revere Jews, Christians and Zoroastrians as peoples of the Book. The messages are generally the same, and Islam sees itself as a continuation of the Jewish and Christian messages. In fact, all Muslims around the world pray towards a house of God built by a Jew (Abraham).

Q: How do you feel about Christians?
A: Christians are great. I am most impressed with the volunteer and community service work that many churches do. Nuns are awesome. Whatever happened to that show where Sally Fields is the nun that can fly with that hat?

Q: Why were some Muslims offended by the Danish cartoons that depicted Prophet Muhammad as a terrorist?
A: There are a few main reasons: First, it is forbidden to show the image of the Prophet Muhammad (be it painting, sculpture, cartoon...) Second, not only was it the image of the Prophet, but it was a derogatory one with a bomb wrapped around his turban etc. Another thing is that most of the people in Muslim countries live under authoritarian governments, so 'freedom of speech' is not really acknowledge there--many people there think that if it got printed in the paper it must have had a government sanction/approval, even though there was nothing that the Danish government could do.

Q: Were you offended?
A: Hell yes I was offended. The cartoons are very derogatory, but what it does is highlight the double standards and thinly veiled racism that exists in Europe towards Muslims. Listen, we have a free press in America too, but just because you have the ability to offend and insult religions, doesn't make it right to do so. Most European countries guard and cultivate their culture, which is one of the reasons why its such a great place to visit. Part of the European identity is Christianity; being Muslim and being European seem to be mutually exclusive at this point (which is not the case in America).

Q: What takes place in a mosque during Friday prayers?
A: People go to the mosque for the middle prayer (Asr) around noontime. You listen to a sermon and then you pray together. The sermon can be given by anyone in the community, and often is coupled with the Imam's speech. The talks vary, from the importance of charity (zakat) or education, or chastity, or anything else you can think of.

Q: Do you still think Dirk Nowitzki is a good defensive player?
A: Yes, he is a good team defender. Rebounds and blocks are part of team defense.



So there you have it. While I did describe Sherkhan as "an average Muslim," he is only one person, not over one billion (the number of Muslims in the world). There are plenty of Muslims who know good defense when they see it.

Pride And Prejudice

I am most proud of my people when tragedy becomes our impetus to help others. I am proud to be a Jew when I learn about the role that many Jews played in the Civil Rights Movement or in the effort to stop genocide in Darfur; their motivation stemming directly from the lessons of hate and injustice that caused the Holocaust.

I am most shamed when we as Jews only utilize those lessons for our own good; when we fail to empathize with other downtrodden people as we have been throughout our history. That stone-faced short-sightedness deeply hurts me.

Sad KniBilNats

New York Knicks
Last year's rookies are the brightest light in the Knicks future. Nate Robinson, Channing Frye, and David Lee hustled as best they could. With experience, Robinson and Frye can lead the Knicks to glory (with a lot of help) and Lee can be an important role player.

Jamal Crawford and Eddy Curry have shown flashes of absolute greatness. But it's far too infrequent.

The overpaid players signed to long contracts are just weighing the Knicks down. Isiah Thomas has kept bringing losing players with long contracts instead of starting over. The Knicks are stuck for a few years now. Thomas is now going to coach this team. If Larry Brown couldn't turn them around, there's little hope for Thomas, who I really liked before he joined the Knicks front office. Besides his inept job as general manager, there is an allegation of sexual harassment.

Balkman and Collins, the two recent draftees, better work their asses off next season. We need it.

Buffalo Bills
Marv Levy has come back to the Bills in a front office capacity. I love Marv, but some have already questioned his first two picks in this year's draft. The Bills have a loser quarterback, J.P. Losman (pronounced Loss man). Running back Willis McGahee needs to reach superstar status for us to be any good. Losing Eric Moulds hurts our receiving core. We should have a solid defense and Levy will make sure the Bills have a great special teams. But the team's fortunes rest with the questionable offense.

Washington Nats
I'm most excited about the Nats, but probably because this is only their second year in DC. I love manager Frank Robinson, who probably won't be back next year. Much of the Nats success over the next ten years must be given to Frank Robinson for his job during this tough transition period. Hopefully, the Nats can keep Alphonso Soriano (So So Good). Ryan Zimmerman (Zee) probably won't be the best player on a winning team, but he very well could be the star sidekick in a couple of years. I really like Jose Guillen, but all accounts have him on his way out.

The Nats have had two major problems in their time in DC thus far. Far too many pitchers have succumbed to injury over the last two seasons. Most teams need about 6 solid starters to keep winning. The Nats have needed a minimum of nine this season. The Nats have had a bunch of good hitters, but several always struggle at the same time. Last year B-dub and Vinny hit poorly all year long (and of course Guzman). Also, I didn't realize a team could have that many sub .250 hitters on their roster at one time.

By the way, I love Marlon Byrd, but no one cheers for him at the game. True, he should be the 4th outfielder if we could have our way, but he always gives his best and is playing a great centerfield lately. Cheer for Marlon Byrd!