I know. I know. Things are bad. Our economy is crumbling (like a cookie!), we've been isolated internationally (since the Tajikistan Crisis), and you're fed up (an ironic choice of words I'll admit, considering there's no food). I am too. My fellow citizens of our great country, I'm here to say I feel your pain. Can we turn things around? Yes we can!
Just remember, you're either with us or against us.
Today's decrees
I hereby decree the unveiling of a new calendar titled The Girls of My Harem, only $9.95, sold everywhere fine retailers are located and want to stay in business.
Check out Miss January, she's the hottest!
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