Crime and Punishment

I was an alternate juror on a case that just ended. The man was deemed guilty, but because I wasn't needed, I was excused before the deliberation. After the trial I realized that I was quite happy that I didn't have to determine the defendant's fate. Personally, I reject the assumption that a person who commits a crime should be punished in the way we think of the term. Caging people in prisons doesn't aid society in anyway. We should attempt to rehabilitate those that are able and find a more appropriate situation for those that are not.

Prison is a vicious place designed to dehumanize. It is a place where love and compassion are perceived as weaknesses; violence is the norm. That got me thinking of alternative punishments that can be handed out:

• The convicts receive repeated pink bellying.
• For the rest of their life, they are only allowed to listen to Rod Stewart or Bryan Adams albums. (This might be considered cruel and unusual punishment; we're checking on it.)
• The victim gets to perpetrate a crime against the convict of equal or lesser value.
• The only TV you are allowed to watch is Nancy Grace's show.
• Every time asked about the offense, the convict is require to state, "First of all, I'd like to thank my lord and savior Jesus Christ for giving me the ability to commit this crime."
• Whenever the convict takes a dump, toilet paper is removed from their stall.
• Convicts have to pay twice as much for a gallon of gas as the rest of us.
• They are required to sit on a jury as an alternate for a week-long case.