Review of the State of the Union Address

Note to President Bush: The word you're looking for is history, not histry. Also, again nuclear, not nucular.

Mr. Bush began the speech preaching bi-partisanship and then gave a nearly entirely conservative agenda. He again called for bi-partisanship, but on his own terms.

Mr. Bush reserved the right to attack any country that is not "democratic." However, he did urge the Iranian people to stand up against their government, instead of threatening attack as he did with Iraq.

There was one reference to the destruction caused by Hurricane Katrina. It came nearly 50 minutes into a 51 minute speech. It lasted less than one minute. I think this further proves the goverment's lack of concern for the people of the Gulf Coast.

The only bright spot of the speech came when Mr. Bush called for research for alternative energy and to lessen America's dependence on foreign oil. However, following through with this pledge is another thing entirely.

The Cry For Justice

The cry of the racist: I do not see races, we are all human.

The cry of the imperialist: Nation-states are not an important part of identity.

The cry of the oppressor: Christmas is a secular holiday.

The cry of the sexist: Men and women have equal opportunity.

The cry of the ignorant: History has not bearing on today.

Hunger Strike

I've been on a hunger strike and a sleep strike for much of this past week. Something was missing though. But the purpose of life is learning. Twenty four years on this earth have taught me many invaluable lessons. This week I've learned yet another lesson. Before beginning a hunger or a sleep strike, you should at least choose some kind of cause to strike for. Publicity doesn't hurt either. Now, I'm off to the MacDonalds. Then a nap.

Anti-Semitism

There is only one person I know more anti-Semitic than I am. But keep in mind, I didn't really know Hitler.


She is also a Jew. Take a bow Grandma!

Some Scary Shit

"There is no shame in this solution which prevents the wasting of billions of dollars that have gone to those with influence and merchants of war in America who have supported Bush's election campaign."


- Osama bin Laden


I think it's scary when we've reached the point where bin Laden is more reasonable than Bush.

Report From the Sidelines

In an effort to return to my roots as an investigative journalist, this just in.

Hubert Davis, who was a part of the 1993 NCAA men's basketball champion University of North Carolina Tar Heels, and had a distinguished NBA career as a three-point shooting specialist for the New York Knicks, and now announces the WAC game of the week on ESPN on Mondays at 12:00am eastern time, sounds like Xzibit.

Bad Refs

There has been a rash of bad officiating in American sports of late. Ok, two really really really bad calls.

The first came a week ago in the Colts-Steelers game. Troy Polamalu of Pittsburgh picked Peyton Manning's pass. He fell to the ground. He rolled over. He played banjo while on the ground. He called all of his friends on his cell. He named every American president in history. Then he got up to run with the ball. His knee inadvertently knocked the ball out of his grasp. The ref reviewed the play. He stared at the play, watching it in slow motion, again and again.

Then he decided it was an incomplete pass. No, seriously, he did! It wasn't on the fly, he reviewed it that way!

Yesterday, Tom Penders, head coach of Houston, fainted during the game. The refs gave him a technical foul, I guess assuming he was faking. As Penders was carted off, after he was resuscitated, the refs did not rescind the technical.

Both are terrible.

Stephen Colbert Is A Thief

I was just watching the Colbert Report (the T's are silent), when I saw this:

It's true because it rhymes.

That is my phrase! I also say that! I don't get credit for anything. One day, all of these thieves that steal my many catch phrases will feel my wrath. This wrath will come in the form of biting sarcasm directed at these thieves. Oh, and believe you me, the sarcasm will be biting.

Stephen Colbert, you're dead to me.

Harsh Sentence

Antonio Davis of the New York Knicks was suspended five games for entering the stands during overtime of the Knicks' game in Chicago with the Bulls. He believed his wife was being harassed by a Bulls' fan. He confronted the fan, but took no action. Davis' wife and son calmed him down. He was immediately ejected from the contest in accordance with NBA guidelines.

He should not have been suspended. He does have a great reputation as a person and is the president of the players union, so he is clearly responsible. He believed his family was in danger, which was more important than a basketball game at that moment. Nothing resulted from his entrance into the crowd. Plus, he already received punishment when he was ejected from the game.

I do understand a one game suspension, because of the brawl in Detroit last season. It would send a message to the NBA players that there will be repercussions for entering the stands, but they can feel comfortable protecting their family members if need be.

A five game suspension, which has been admittedly reduced from a potentially harsher sentence because of Davis' reputation, only provokes fans further. This Bulls fan threatened Davis' wife, provoking Antonio to come to her defense, causing a five game suspension. Had he reacted violently, he would be suspended for the season. There is nothing stopping fans from continuing this provocation. NBA players stand to lose much more than fans do. It is simply not fair to these players to hold them to such a higher standard than the rest of us. As this instance shows, if a player so much as tries to be by his wife's side during an argument, he faces a five game suspension, if he has a good reputation.

David Stern has taken his role as task master a bit too seriously of late.

A Win For the Ages

Many talented teams have passed through the gym at Goucher College since I first arrived on the campus in 2000. At 0-13, this year's team does not fit that category.

Mary Washington beat Goucher consistently by 20 when we were good. So, everything pointed towards a Goucher loss of epic proportions. Except there was one problem, no one told Goucher's men basketball team.

This was the first game that I had been to this season. I knew we were undersized, but we started five guards. Predictably, Mary Washington took an early lead. Then entered a couple of big men. This opened the floor up for our shooters. The game was tied at the half.

Back and forth the two teams went until the end of the game. Mary Washington's Lee stroked a jumper straddling the three point line with four seconds to go.

Four timeouts later, Goucher in bounded the ball to Jon G. He ran up the court, double teamed. He rose up 30-feet away from the basket. Two players' hands were in his face. The ball flew towards the hoop. And... it... went... in.

We danced around like we had just won the championship, instead of pulling off the first win of a dismal season. The first of many to come.